A few pictures of me from yesterday, celebrating my 30th birthday, I had a very good time, with friends and family. Got myself some decent gifts, and a lot to drink, which I am now dealing with the day after 😀 my hangovers are quite light though, I mostly just feel tired.
Also I spent a ton of money on getting my hair colored last week, and in the second picture it looks exactly like it did before I had it dyed.
I am turning 30 years of age on Saturday(November 4th) even if I have only lived the last couple as myself. I got my hair, brows and lashes done, and though it was expensive as fuck, I am still very happy with the “investment”
Turning 30 is kind of weird when you just started out on your life, I am grabbing random strangers, shaking them, demanding that they answer what the hell happened to my teens and twenties. The way I act, they way I dress and live, is a product of me trying to rediscover a youth I never had. I am a girl out of her time, my soul is 19 but potential dates have kids, career etc.
I AM 19! I DON’T WANT TO BE STEPMOTHER TO YOUR KIDS!
Whoever I feel like, however short my real life has been, nature is dragging me in a direction, and I have to confront that. Turning 30 in of itself doesn’t bother me a whole lot, I won’t feel different, it is the situation it automatically puts me in that bothers me. Everyone seems to either have kids or want kids, the biological clock that seems to be ticking for everyone else, was never installed in me. People want houses, things, shit. I am just out here trying to have fun, be happy, yet it seems the rest of the world is marching by another tune.
I am not complaining about my situation, since I would probably also hate hanging out with a bunch of teens, haha. I have just been putting a lot thought into what turning 30 really means to me.
I actually considered shutting down the blog, just end it, move on to a new chapter in my life, but that is kind of stupid, because why does it make any sense to now, just because the clock turns from 29 to 30. I will end the blog when I no longer feel like I am getting something positive out of it.
I have 15-20 people coming over Saturday, so hopefully we can go crazy in town, and act like a bunch of teens 🙂
In case you feel bad if you don’t send me a birthday gift for my 30th birthday, then here is my WISH LIST
The stars just haven’t aligned for me to spend half a day on the big picture sets, so you have to make do with these bathroom quickies, but I hope you still enjoy. I also need to get around to posting a new gift thread, since even though I haven’t been that active, I still received a lot of lovely gifts 🙂
In other news, I have started taking progesterone, which have made the girls grow a little more, though not by much. The nipples look a little more defined, and I feel like my erections have gotten back some of their old potency. My sex drive has also had a noticeable increase.
I’ve also started on estrogen patches instead of taking the pills, but I need to have blood work done to make sure my levels are high enough.
It had been so long since I had last taken pictures, that it felt great to get a chance to do it again. I realized though that I really need to get some upper body lingerie, I had nothing to go with what I was wearing on my lower body.
I am enjoying my weekend watching GSL and WCS (Starcraft tournaments, for those not into that particular esport) I have also had a lot fun of playing the old Starcraft these past weeks since the remaster came out.
Finally got some time home alone so I could doll up and take some pictures for you lovely people.
Give some Likes and Reblogs if you would like to see the rest of pictures. How else will I know? 😀
Life update: I am almost done with my current internship, I can extend it, but I would rather move on to bigger and better things. I will probably continue showing up there until I find something else, just to keep myself going.
I am also getting real fucking tired of being referred to as he/him, even BOY. They don’t do it on purpose, and say sorry each time, but it is still pretty obvious how they subconsciously see me. It isn’t a problem with the young people, but the 50+ people misgender me more than they get it right. I got invited to a trip with all the female colleagues, but I made up an excuse of why I couldn’t go. I just don’t want to be the wolf in sheep’s clothing in a group a women. Even if they try to be accepting, they just don’t truly believe it. Ironically I feel more comfortable around the old men working there, even if they don’t see me as the woman I feel like, it means they see me as one of their own, so I fit in. It is certainly far from ideal, but at least I can relax around the men.
I had gotten used to sometimes being referred to as he/him by mistake, but that was always by people who I also knew before I transitioned. It caught me off guard that people who have only known me as I am now, will misgender me. It has made me second guess my approach of always being upfront about being transgender, and has made voice training a higher priority.
Overall though, I am happy. I am great at the work that I do, and I am respected for my effort and results. I have always been a terrible student, and never had a job that I enjoyed, so feeling the respect of others, and getting treated like an equal is a new experience for me. In the end that outweighs the fact that I am misgendered from time to time.
Update on my weight loss. It has been less than a week and I have already lost 2kg. So early on, much of it is simply going to be water weight, but it is going very well. The quantity of food I feel the need to consume is much lower now, even though I am using up more energy. I am just another 2kg away from no longer being overweight according BMI. Saturday I will be drinking with friends, so I will probably see a small setback, but at my current rate, that shouldn’t be a problem.